So my sister said I seriously need to update my blog. The last week and a half have been so busy for our little family. I should explain a little bit about what I mean. When Jeff lost his job last February it was one of the scariest and most humbling moments of both of our lives. As we trusted the Lord and the plan he has for us we were able to find the strength to make things work. It seemed like forever before he was able to get another job, it was actually 2 months, which was long enough, but the point was that we were okay. You see, Jeff made sure I finished college and got my degree in Social Work. I had been working part time for about 6 months when Jeff lost his job.
Because of the blessing of my Social Work License I was able to pick up another job answering the after hours child protection emergency line at night and on the weekends. It was such a blessing and though thankful, it has turned out to be one of the hardest, most stressful jobs I have ever had. Luckily I am on a rotation and I only do it once every 5 or 6 weeks. Well, I was on-call this last week and it was full of quite emotional experiences.
As I looked at a beautiful baby girl born with meth in her system and having to be hooked up to a bypass machine because she could not breathe on her own, I felt so angry at her mother who denied ever using meth. I felt complete selfishness on the part of the mom and I could not imagine how she could jeopardize her beautiful baby's health. I walked away feeling helpless, for myself and for that baby. I wanted to yell at the mom and tell her how stupid she is and how she doesn't deserve to have children, but I told her she can work through this and if she does what she needs to for her child she can work to get her back. ( Her baby was placed in foster care the next day.) It didn't seem fair.
My week was full of trying experiences ( bruised children, angry parents, police, runaways), but the hardest part was leaving my little ones. Though Jeff was there and I am grateful for him, it is never easy to leave your own children, to take care of someone elses. Traeton understands and always asks me if I helped someone. Unfortunately, this weekend, because of work, I let Traeton suffer through a double ear infection and tonsilitis. Of course I didn't know he had all that, but yesterday when I took him to the doctor that was the diagnosis. I felt so terrible. It is hard to be a mom and make the tough choices. I debated taking him in Sunday night and now wish that I had listened to my instincts. I am learning, through being a mom, wife, woman, that I have to listen to the promptings. Whether intuition or the spirit, with the Lord we are so much more powerful than we think.
1 comment:
Oh that precious Traeton sure has had his share of medical visits. Is this the refiners fire?
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